Fertility counselling can help you regain control and restore hope.

Infertility is a widespread issue which has a major impact on a couple’s psychological and psychosocial wellbeing. It is a life crisis which an increasing number of couples and individuals are facing today.

One of the predominate aspects and one which is least understood among society is the feeling of loss or the disenfranchised grief experienced by couples going through infertility.

There are a number of losses experienced throughout the ordeal of infertility. There is the loss of control over one’s body, this can be at the outset when a couple first realise they are having difficulties conceiving and it can also refer to the lack of control during the fertility treatment processes. There is the loss of the ability to conceive a baby naturally. For those who do not choose IVF or those with unsuccessful treatments there is the loss of the potential to have a child. There is also the loss of identity within society where the couple no longer fit into the “parent group”. There is loss of immortality as children may be seen as the way to live on. There is also loss of the experience of pregnancy, loss of sexual identity or loss of confidence.

Many couples struggle to come to terms with a diagnosis on their own. Reconstructing new meanings and identities can be difficult to do without guidance and can result in relationship breakdown, depression, anxiety and overall decrease in life satisfaction. However, with the help of a therapist, couples and individuals can negotiate the grieving process associated with infertility, heal their relationships and reassess their motivations and life plan.

There are interventions available to couples with fertility problems and counselling can help whether the couple are still ‘trying’ or whether they have decided to cease treatments and try and accept that their chances may be over. At Livewell Counselling & Psychotherapy a Person-Centred approach is used alongside CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) techniques and Constructivist Psychotherapy. It is important that people know that there is professional, empathetic support out there.

For couples who have run out of hope there also has to be a way to redefine themselves. Counselling and psychotherapy can help a couple through their grief and help them to take their finger off the pause button and try and live life. It can help couples achieve a level of acceptance.

The problem of infertility may be permanent or temporary. It may last a couple of years or a lifetime. Most of the time there is no way of knowing and so the emotional pain often sees no end. However, couples can be guided to rework their self-images, their identities and their relationship with each other and their extended families. This may help them to accept their current diagnosis and see themselves as having vital roles in their relationship, their family and in society.

Infertility can be a long and arduous journey. Because no two peoples experience is exactly the same it can be very lonely at times. Family, friends and society are usual not equipped to respond to the pain felt by a couple faced with infertility. Professional help in particular fertility counselling is therefore highly important.

Fertility Counselling is available to couples or on an individual basis.